Category Archives: Negative Nancy

I’ve Got 99 Problems, and a Hip is Definitely One

What am I, 90? Seriously, who has a bum hip at 31?

To be fair, I was technically born with a bum hip as I suffered from a congenital hip location at birth.  One of our family dogs had a dislocated hip when I was younger, Dad likes to say it “runs in the family” – Hilarious, I’m sure.  Thankfully I was lucky enough to have the Miracle workers at Sick Kids Hospital in Toronto, led by the Late Great Dr. Robert Salter, ensure I was a fully functional biped.

All seemed well in the joint until last Winter during the beginning of my Half Marathon Training.  All of a sudden I couldn’t put my left boot on – you know that motion when you bring your lower leg up inwards and sideways so its easier to slip on a boot or a sock?  Yup, couldn’t do that. Thankfully with the combo of rest and lots of Physio, Massage and Chiro I was able to finish my training and run my Half Marathon – Hooray!  The immobility seemingly disappeared, but decided to make a reappearance at the end of summer and this time it brought pain and general discomfort with it to the party.

The second round of assaulting my body with all forms of paramedical services alarmingly was of no help – if anything, I seemed to be getting worse.  I trotted off to see a Sports Medicine Doctor and was promptly ordered an MRA – which is just a regular MRI but with a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad needle beforehand.  Hooray Health Canada, I had my free MRI and associated ‘with contrast’ scary needle procedure booked and completed within a month – keeping in mind this isn’t a medically critical issue.   I love Canada.

To jump to the end of the story, it turns out I have a tear in the labrum of my left hip joint.  Sparing you a detailed anatomy lesson: where my leg bone meets my hip bone, there is a soft thingy that helps them connect, its torn.  The tear causes irritation, which causes inflammation, which then irritates and and inflames everything nearby.  Boo.

So that’s pretty much where I am today.  I know there is an issue that might involve surgery, but it requires a very specialized doctor and I’m pretty far down the list of urgency.  Canada is still awesome, but I’m likely not going to hear from the Surgeon to even have a consultation until the summer and the request went back in November.  In the meantime, I get to spend a ton of time with my Physiotherapist (thankfully she’s fun), which means lots of Ass-upuncture (I’ll spare you the photos, this time) and really just hoping the problem will go away on its own.

Oh, and it hurts more when its cold.  I really am 90.

Bonus points: Apparently this is exactly the same injury Lady Gaga had last year and has clearly recovered well from surgery.  I’ll take what I can get.

In unrelated news – I was invited to join in on a preview of a Brand new GoodLife Fitness Club this week as part of a Blogger event and wrote a recap of my experience for the great people of I’m Fit Possible, check it out!  It was a great night and an excellent opportunity to meet up with some other Bloggy Ladies including Sarah from My Mostly Healthy Life, Tara from I’m Fit Possible, and Krysten from The Misadventures of a Darwinian Fail.  We managed to grab a group shot at the end – clearly after I’d switched back into my new winter boots!

Aren't we cute?

Myself, Tara, Krysten & Sarah

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Filed under Events in Review, Fitness Follies, Negative Nancy

Nancy: Zombiefied

Ok, so my hormones have full control today and I am NOT HAPPY.  Frankly, I would really like to just curl up into the fetal position and cry – and that’s what I’ve wanted to do all day, though I thought it might be a bit tacky at the office.

As I find myself swaying between unnecessary almost-tears, and random and misdirected blind rage – I am reminded of my favourite new App for my iPhone: The Walking Dead Dead Yourself.  The premise is simple, take a photo of yourself and use some preloaded gems to determine just what you might look like as a Zombie.  Apparently, my face is perfect for this process.  I’ve tried it with a few of my friends with very little success, yet every single time I try it with me – bingo, Zombie Perfection.

So while I personally feel like Fire Breathing Dragon right now, it seems like an apt time to share this side of me.  May you hope to never meet her.

Bad Day at the office Nancy

Bad Day at the office Nancy

Terrible Commute Nancy

Terrible Commute Nancy

"Patiently" Waiting for Taxes to be Filed Nancy

“Patiently” Waiting for Taxes to be Filed Nancy

Bored on the Couch Nancy

Bored on the Couch Nancy

I’m going to go ahead and suggest avoiding contact with me for the next 24 hours if you can help it.

Godspeed.

 

 

 

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Filed under Negative Nancy, Pictures Tell a Thousand Words

Crash Landing

Here I sit on the couch, catching up on some trash TV (the Bachelor double episode week – Drama, Drama Drama! oh and lots of mascara tears) and icing both of my knees.

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Knee injury jokes aside, this sucks.

I managed to crash down during a run around Toronto this evening. I had just hit that sweet spot where you remember that you actually like running: My lungs had adjusted to the frosty air and my breathing was under control, I felt strong, my legs were happy in their strides, and it was still light out at six o’clock!!! I was cruising up Jarvis almost at Front st and BAM. Down for the count.

No surprises here really – my relationship with gravity is shaky at best. Plus, you know – I’m only starting to train for a half marathon on Monday, no big deal.

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I think the right knee is going to be particularly fetching.

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Filed under Events in Review, Fitness Follies, How Embarrassing, Negative Nancy, Pictures Tell a Thousand Words

Maybe I’m the Problem?

Its cold right now in Canada.  Really cold.

Ok, maybe it would be worse if I lived in Winnipeg, or frankly even Ottawa – but minus 25 with the windchill is cold in my books.

The thing that really gets me though is that last year, that blissful year when I got to miss out on Winter while working in Australia – it never really got cold in Toronto.  I even detailed my frustrations with the lackluster “summer” I was experiencing in Sydney whilst Torontonians were BBQ’ing in t-shirts in FEBRUARY in this post.  This year though? Time to break out the parkas!

weather gods

Now I get that every season every year has its differences – like the last two summers here were hotter than Hades (no complaints there, by the way).  I still have to wonder though, why does an epically bad summer befall Sydney when I’m there yet we have the first really cold winter out of the last handful of years upon my return?

Not convinced that I’m the problem yet? Consider this – after the wet and cool summer experienced in Sydney during my stay last year, Australia has been blasted with extreme heat this year.  So much so that they had to add new colours to their forecasting chart to identify temperatures in excess of 50 degrees.

BOM

Dear Residents of  Toronto: It may be in your best interest to ship me off to somewhere in the Southern Hemisphere every winter.  Despite the lackluster weather I’ll be the recipient of on my end, I’m still willing to take one for the proverbial team.

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Filed under Negative Nancy, Pictures Tell a Thousand Words

I wish it was a Tupperware party

I received a mysterious invitation via phone call last week from… well… I’ll just say an acquaintance. When he invited me over to his house with no other pretense than “I’d like to introduce you to some people” I wasn’t sure what to think. My first question was “are you going to kill me?” To which he replied “No.” Whew.

Unsure about the nature of the event, I chose a comfortable and flattering outfit for work the next day and started brainstorming with my roommates what I could possibly be in for. My favourite suggestion was Tupperware party.

  • Plain old social event – sure, that could be it, but like with every other possible suggestion why was the only information provided that he wanted to introduce me to some people?
  • Goodbye Party – Acquaintance is heading out of town for a bit, but a goodbye party on the Thursday with invite only on a Wednesday? Maybe.
  • Alone time – or what my sister so eloquently put as ‘Pound or No Pound‘, this was pretty much a zero percent chance but I still picked a cute outfit
  • Tupperware Party/Pampered Chef etc – Would be a bit out of left field, but I could always use some extra tupperware or random kitchen accoutrement that I’ll never get around to using. Plus, those events tend to have booze – bonus.
  • Ponzi Scheme – With the cover of mystery settling over the evening, more than one person brought this up.

I settled into not knowing what was happening and tried to not think about it – Type A hyper-planners such as myself are not OK with this situation, I was definitely a bit anxiety ridden that day. I sent one final text asking if I should bring anything along with me either than Pepper spray and his response only included an address. Prior to heading off into the unknown, I went for drinks with a friend (and possibly the best poutine I’ve ever had) – and was very thankful for the booze in my system later in the night.

When I arrived at the apartment, it was pretty clear that this was not a social gathering: The apartment was spotless (not that I really had a reference point, but it wasn’t ‘party clean’ it was ‘staged clean’), the seats were all arranged to face the TV and there were stacks of materials on the coffee table. It took about a minute or two for me to be able to read one of the items on the coffee table (which was upside down for me) before something clicked and I knew what was going on. The Magazine was Success From Home. Oh. Dear. God.

First sign of trouble ahead...

First sign of trouble ahead…

Over the next 45 minutes I listened to three separate presentations and watched a DVD. In truth though, it took me about 30 seconds to figure out the gist of the situation. When someone opens their presentation with stating that their background was in ‘traditional business’ and that they had slaved away working for someone else before they learned about this business model, my mind went straight to two words: Pyramid Scheme.

According to Wikipedia:

A pyramid scheme is a non-sustainable business model that involves promising participants payment or services, primarily for enrolling other people into the scheme, rather than supplying any real investment or sale of products or services to the public

Now in the interest of not bashing the company (which is actually legit, seriously) or my acquaintance’s ambition, I’m going to leave out the specifics. I will say that there were actual products and services for sale, and something at least semi tangible in return for your original investment.  However, while there really is a lot more to the business than I originally feared, it still boils down to this:  You Invest. Then you get two friends to invest. Then those two friends get two friends to invest. And so on and so forth, all while your income increase with each step (of the pyramid) that you create below you.

I don’t care what legal business practices you apply – when your compensation plan includes images like the one below, its a Pyramid Scheme:

Consider this a sideways Pyramid

Consider this a sideways Pyramid

Thankfully, when the presentation ended there was absolutely zero pressure for me to get on board or sign up for anything further. Thank God. While I realize that the right kind of person likely can profit from this type of investment, that person is definitely not me – first and foremost because I wouldn’t be caught dead inviting people over to get sucked into an evening such as this.

I really wish there was some sort of Dictaphone device that could record my thoughts – because I was doing everything I could to hold it together (especially during the DVD) and, honestly, one sideways glance would have sent me off the edge into the territory of hysterical laughter. Is this really happening? Why? Why Me?

"Overriding Residual Income" ... sure

“Overriding Residual Income” … sure

Lesson Learned: Never accept mysterious invitations.

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Filed under Awk-ward, Events in Review, How Embarrassing, Negative Nancy

Our House is Sick

…and I don’t mean that the residents are sick.

Sadly we discovered some signs of water damage in the basement bathroom this morning that appeared to be coming from the ceiling. We had some plumbers visit and determine that our fridge has slowly been leaking water – likely since we moved in.

We now have two openings in the ceiling, are waiting for things to dry out and trying to figure out what to do next. The joys of homeownership, as they say.

Paint Bubbling around the Shower, and a lovely view of inside the ceiling

Our poor little house is not feeling well – I’ve been trying to hug her and considered making some chicken noodle soup. I hope she gets better soon (and doesn’t bankrupt is in the process)

Another view of inside the ceiling 😦

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Filed under Events in Review, Negative Nancy, Pictures Tell a Thousand Words

Down for the Count

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It was inevitable I guess – I’ve caught a cold. And Nancy is NOT happy about it.

It’s not as if there is actually a “good” time to catch a cold – but a weekend when I’m hosting an old friend is definitely not the best timing. All I could muster in terms of energy last night was to take her for dinner and then watch a terrible movie back at the house. Normally her visits are far less wholesome – but more poor body just won’t comply.

If that wasn’t lame enough for a Friday night, we then had to manage my demonic alarm system going off for apparently no reason at 2am. It is seriously the loudest thing I’ve ever heard times a million. Extremely hard to manage when you’re out of It on night time cold meds. Let’s hope there isn’t an actual fire or carbon monoxide issue because I’ve cut the detectors off at their source – the electrical panel.

So here I am at 6pm on a Saturday, hiding in bed hoping to muster up enough energy to at least take my friend out for a drink.

The constant rain isn’t helping my spirits either 😦

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Filed under Events in Review, Negative Nancy, Pictures Tell a Thousand Words