Monthly Archives: March 2012

Bus Anxiety

Deep breaths. Calm Blue Ocean.

Nancy is taking a bus.

Not only am I taking a bus, but I’m taking it in Thailand and its going to be 9 hours. Unfortunately the much cushier sounding VIP night bus was sold out and I’m now traveling on a (I imagine) much seedier variety in the middle of the day.

Plan is to not ever even think of using the bathroom on the bus, plug into my iPod and hopefully be whisked far far away and wake up in Mae Sot. More likely scenario involves a sweaty and irritated Nancy seated next to a very smelly old perv.

The 2 hour wait is doing nothing for my nerves.

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This can’t be worse than the 48 hour bus trip Cherie and I did in Australia 12 years ago, can it?

Panic. Panic. PANIC.

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Welcome To Paradise

Do I have to come home?

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Standby Frizz

Standby folks – the humidity is doing more to my brain than it is to my hair, which is saying something if you evaluate what’s happened to my mop below.

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Will return to regularly scheduled programming once I escape the wonderful existence I’m currently trapped in…

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O Canada

My home and Maple land.

I was originally planning on butchering the entire anthem and turning it into a love song for my homeland – but I think its for the best if I just stop here.

As much as I’ve enjoyed my time here in Australia, and am very much looking forward to my South East Asian Adventure (with Tigger, Brown Squirrel, Toe Socks and her Yankee Lover), there is a huge part of me that is yearning to have my feet back on Canadian Soil.

Obviously, a big part of any extended trip away from home is missing your friends, family and pets.  That goes without saying, and hence shall be discussed no further – because really, who wants to read about how much I miss my Cat? 🙂

There are a smattering of other things about home, and just some Canadiana in general that I’m pining for right now though:

Tim Horton’s – Yup, I’m that Canadian.  While the coffee here in Australia is superb – every cup is seriously a masterpiece –  I can’t help buy crave the familiar taste of a Timmie’s Regular (not a Double-Double girl myself, too sweet).  Missing Roll up the Rim to Win seriously upped the ante here.

The Leslieville Diner – Who doesn’t love breakfast? I’ve had a few fabulous morning and brunch style meals here, but there is something to be said for your neighbourhood Greasy Spoon and I LOVE the Leslieville Diner.  Not only do they have bottomless coffee (oh, percolated coffee – how I miss your sub par quality and watered down ways) and delicious hash browns, but they provide a large squeezy bottles of hot sauce!  There is also a retro and quirky charm to the place, like the ‘reserved’ signs that are constantly present on the window tables, but don’t seem to mean anything and the fact that they remain a cash only business.

Accents – Specifically less Australian ones.  Don’t get me wrong, the Australian accent is among my favourites – but hearing it too much is ruining it for me.  I want to still swoon every time I hear an Aussie accent like I used too!  Also, having been told by a waiter recently that I have a strong accent (really??) I’m looking forward to hearing ‘Eh‘, ‘Aboot‘ and ‘Hoouse’ in everyday conversation.  While I will never admit that we actually say aboot(because we don’t), I’m acutely aware now of some of the nuances of our accent and I miss hearing it.

Bagels – Seriously.  I don’t even eat that many, but why don’t they have any here?  I found a place called Brown’s Bagels in Melbourne that did, in fact, have bagels – but they weren’t quite right.  Neither the doughiness of the bagel itself nor the herbiness of the cream cheese were on target.  Also, they didn’t have an Everything variety. (see: Tim Horton’s)

Toronto – The city itself, and everything it contains.  The Shopping. The vile, but necessary, TTC.  The Dining. The Venues. The embarrassment of our wretched Mayor. The oh-so-iconic CN Tower. The Neighbourhoods.  The East vs West Rivalry (East!). The People.    I think I feel the same way as Carrie Bradshaw did about New York – and I miss it in my life.

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Type-A Travel Volume Two: Backpacking

Packing Paradox

Fancy Nancy + Backpacking? This is going to be interesting.

As my time in Oz draws to a close, I have been busying myself with preparations for the next few legs of my voyage: a few days in Singapore, and 11 days in Thailand and Cambodia!  I’ve already discussed my hunt for conservative clothing and disposable footwear – but now comes the hard part, packing!  I’ve also mentioned before that packing is something of an event for me, not so much just a task to complete.

I traveled to Oz with two suitcases – one of which weighed 70 pounds! – a carry on bag, and a large backpack (which was tucked inside the large suitcase).  I plan on traveling to Singapore with the same items, and then checking the two suitcases at the Left Luggage service in Singapore when I head off  to Thailand and collect them on my way back through to catch my flight home.  To slightly complicate things (in the best possible way) Tigger is joining me for the rest of my trip including my last weekend in Oz.  As he only has 2.5 days to soak in Australia, I don’t plan on wasting any of his time on my packing.

To slightly lessen the neuroses of this process, I have decided to go Spreadsheet-less for the last two weeks of my voyage.  Gasp! No spreadsheet with each outfit (including shoes and accessories) meticulously planned? The Horror.  Have no fear though, Type-A Nancy is still here and has this whole situation under control!

Step 1: The Smaller Suitcase

This one would be packed first with everything I absolutely wouldn’t need in Singapore or for the rest of my vacation, so it will be the least amount of maintenance going forward.  Also, would try to transfer as much weight as possible into this bag – due to its size it can’t possibly go over the limit but I might as well get it to take on as much as it can.

This was the easiest step by far, just packing my now unnecessary work clothes required little thought.  This bag has been packed, locked and ready to go for several days now – hopefully not to be rifled through until I arrive back safely in Toronto.

Step 2: Select Wardrobe for Singapore

Pretty straightforward, but important to make sure that at least two office appropriate outfits remained accessible after Step 1 was complete.  Decided to pick work outfits that aren’t alarmingly corporate so I don’t have to pick a secondary outfit for the evenings.  Nancy: 1

Step 3: Select Wardrobe for Vacation

I’ve been acutely aware since planning this trip to Thailand that backpacking will likely involve actually carrying around my own stuff – on my back.  Unlike when Cherie and I ‘backpacked’ through Australia back in 2000, which involved me carrying my bag a sum total of once for about a block and a half – and I bitched and moaned the whole time.

Without actually creating a spreadsheet, I have been subconsciously dressing myself for the different parts of the trip and therefore had a good idea of what I was definitely bringing and what I was definitely not bringing.  The pile of ‘maybes’ wasn’t insurmountable either.

This is less than I usually pack when only going away for a weekend!

Step 4: Reassess Wardrobe for Vacation

I had been expecting to have to lie out everything I was planning to put in the backpack, and then remove half of it – but this was the opposite of what happened.  For the first time in my life I had underpacked.  In my ‘To Pack’ pile I had a few skirts (thanks Kmart!), my new Lulu Cargopants a couple of dresses and a handful of tshirts.  Assuming that I don’t plan on doing laundry the whole time and knowing that I definitely won’t wear dirty clothes – I actually had to revisit my ‘maybe’ pile and select a few more things.  It was like Christmas, sort of.

I even tested out what packing the backpack would be like – and with four pair of shoes and all my clothes and toiletries it was 1. Not terribly heavy and 2. Not even remotely full. Success!

Step 5: Begin Packing Large Suitcase & Stage Remaining Steps

Not absolutely all of my unnecessary items for the next two weeks fit into the smaller suitcase – which makes sense.  So I have now put as much as physically possible into the bottom of that bag and it awaits the remainder of my packing later this weekend.

Packing in Process (Packed Suitcase in the Back!)

I currently have several piles of clothes strategically lined up around the apartment waiting for their turn to be packed:

  • Airplane clothes for the trip home (Singapore – Hong Kong – Toronto), which I don’t want to end up buried at the bottom of the bag.
  • Airplane clothes for traveling to Singapore plus my few Singapore outfits – these will be packed last (and I’ll be wearing some of them.. )
  • A few different options of things to wear this weekend – The weather is typically not going to cooperate and the predictions are changing by the day, so I need some variety available
  • Thailand/Cambodia inventory
  • The tiny remains of my ‘Maybe’ pile, so they are close at hand when I finally get around to packing up the backpack before leaving Singapore

Step 6: Primp

 After all that planning, stressing and fritzing about, it was about time to just take care of Nancy 🙂

Little Vino and a Face Mask, oui?

Tigger arrives in less than 12 hours, I can hardly stand it!

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Granny Panties

Today’s post is brought to you by the colour Beige.

First off, I hate the word Panties – but this isn’t a post about my strange relationship with the English language.  Also, the fact that I’m posting about underwear confirms the fact that I went out and purchased new undies today – seven new undies to be exact! And yes, Mom, I know that my currentl collection of about 60 pair is probably sufficient, but that isn’t the point.

Anywho, I long ago determined that the best colour for a bra that won’t show through anything (provided that it fits well) is beige.  I’m not saying that I only wear beige bras, because that simply isn’t true – my bra collection is almost as ridiculously overstated as my undies.  However, people who think that we can’t see their white bra under their white shirt are just plain wrong. Beige, on the other hand, disappears and all that’s left are the proper attention seekers – your curves – and not the awkward ‘hey! check out my bra’ look that so many unfortunate souls sport.  Also to note, there is a time and place for purposely drawing attention to a bra in a semi see through shirt – but I like to think that the office is neither the time nor the place.

Once I made my discovery of the wonderful power of beige, I had to convince myself to actually jump in feet first and purchase a beige bra.  Why, you ask? Because there is a strong correlation between Beige and Boring.  It is definitely more fun to go bra shopping and try on all the lacy and neon coloured ones, not so much with trying on the t-shirt variety beige ones that are available – it takes the fun out of it.  It would be the equivalent of going to an amusement park and only going on the swings, the activity is the same but you’re missing the best part.

I had a coworker once who was so opposed to wearing beige bras – citing them as matronly – that she resorted to wearing orange ones as a means to better camouflage her undergarments beneath white shirts.  Frankly, her plan mostly worked as the orange hue was infinitely less noticeable than a blatant white outline.  However, the bright orange bra straps that were visible periodically kind of killed her theory.

While I may have overcome my fear of beige in the bra department, the same cannot be said for underwear.  Beige underwear = Granny Panties. AmIright?

The time for change, as they say, is now.

Its no secret that I’m a huge fan of leggings, they are the most comfortable things in the world.  Unfortunately though, black stretchy fabric is not the most opaque thing in the world – especially if you have a Caboose like mine.  I always try to wear black undies and longer tops, but am still very conscious of the fact that any bending over = Look at Nancy’s Panties!  It finally occurred to me the other day (I’m blonde, it takes quite some time for thoughts to bubble up to the surface) that beige underwear may be the solution.

Thus began the internal debate of ‘Should I‘ or ‘Shouldn’t I’? Would opting for beige undies be giving up?  Would it cause me to totally jump past the 30 mark that I’m so nervous about and land right at 70? Would I be wearing – gasp! – Granny Panties?

I reasoned with myself that the vast majority of the time, no one knows what my underwear looks like and that the judging looks I was already picturing were just in my imagination.  Also, I wouldn’t be chucking all my cute lacy and colourful pair in the trash, they would just be relegated to non-legging related outfits.  So I struck off in search of new knickers.  To my delight, La Senza must understand my predicament and had plenty of beige underwear available that still had all the features of my other non Granny Panty collection: Lace, Bows and a variety of different styles.  The best part was I didn’t have to buy a single pair that would go up to my arm pits! Yes, they do make bikini, hip hugger, boy short and other varieties available in beige.  Who knew?

Was searching for more relevent pictures, and instead found this one. You’re welcome.

I selected a mix of beige, black and one combo stripey and flowery pair (I’m still fun and sexy, see!) and headed for the counter.  I was expecting judging or possibly even pitying looks from the pretty blondes at the cash register, but received nothing of the sort – one of the ladies even complimented me on my selection! (although, in hindsight, that was a bit strange)

I’m going to take my new beige undies on a test drive this week, wearing leggings and a short top or possibly even a white dress.  Wish me luck!

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Bacon. Is There Anything it Can’t Do?

Seriously, what would I do without the Internet?

Faced with the dilemma of believing I have a glass splinter in the bottom of my foot, and not wanting to figure out how to access Medical advice in a foreign country – I took to the Internet for help.

That brings us up to the present, which
finds me lying on my couch with a piece bacon strapped to my foot. Something about salt drawing out the splinter…?

It must be true if they put it on the Internet, right? That or I’m just the jackass with pork product on her foot.

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Filed under Funny Ha-Ha, How Embarrassing, Pictures Tell a Thousand Words